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City: London
State/Province:
Country: GB

Age: 24
Height: 5' 7"
Weight: 126 lbs.
Hair Color: Dark Brown
Eye Color: Blue
Body Type: Slim
Ethnicity: White

Occupation: fashioning.

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Interests

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cakes biscuits dresses moustaches (on me and others) hairy chests big shoulders and tight things

Music I Like:

prince princess stephanie of monaco david e. sugar crystal castles kap bambino riot in belgium tepr heartbreak shitty french electro and italodisco, mainly.

Films I Like:

the hunger suspiria in bed with madonna

Literature I Like:

anything big, thick and french.

TV Shows I Like:

molto sexy ftv the gilmore girls. usually in five hour blocks on saturdays.

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about

stylekills

I like repetition and routine. And repetition.

yeah.
yeah.
yeah?

in a word, soigne. and I bet the fags barely use that shtick these days.

all day I look at dresses and then I write nasty things about them. it's every boy's dream. right?

I'm quite evasive generally. I almost fear the outside world. thus the fact I am the colour of carnation milk. I think I'm getting thinner, even though that's pretty much impossible with my cracked-out battenberg-centric diet. I like tight things and big shoulders. in every sense of those words.

sorely lacking. and slacking. oh, this is hardcore.

that last line used to sound a lot cooler. maybe I'm getting old...

love,
Alex.

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Blog

egocentric

egocentric - LiveJournal.com

Long time (8/25/09) [View | Hide]

(4/15/09) [View | Hide]

the sublime. (3/16/09) [View | Hide]

(3/8/09) [View | Hide]

2008. (1/2/09) [View | Hide]

this is something of an institution now, I feel. depressing, right?
especially considering hollyoaks has now been my favourite tv programme for almost half a decade...

for the record...

2003
2004
2005
2006
2007

and naturally, here's 2008.

what did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before? covered london and paris fashion weeks. twice. quit a job I hated, got a job I loved. got a haircut that didn't make me scream and beat myself with horror (I dare say I actually liked it). wore lots and lots of margiela. achieved pretty much every goal I ever wanted and never ever realistically believed I could. lived happily ever after? oh, and bill FUCKING cunningham took my picture. which made my fashion week, in a very superficial way.
how did you see in the new year? if anyone has any idea, I'd appreciate you letting me know. 
did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I spent more, that's for sure...
did someone close to you give birth? not to my knowledge. and it should stay that way. toilet duck nozzles are that shape for a reason:

p.s. god this is so vile.

did anyone close to you die?

been there, bought the t-shirt(s). 

what countries did you visit? france. a few too many times for comfort. that's right, I'll be bitching about being sent to paris quite a lot. I never tire of looking a gift horse in the mouth. 
what would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008? a fucking holiday. AND A GINGERBREAD HOUSE!

sweet as a nut, mate. 

what date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? february 13th, august 4th, september 19th, lundi 29 septembre a 18h30 le 104, halle aubervilliers 5 rue curial 75019 paris (m. crimée ou riquet)
what was your biggest achievement(s) of the year? I can't even think about it. everything. this year has been pretty amazing all around. 
what was/were your biggest failure(s)? my time-keeping reached a new low. I actually managed to wake up five hours late one day. it's a gift.
did you suffer illness or injury? nothing that couldn't be solved with whiskey and lemsip. except the rampant alcoholism and narcotic dependency, I mean. 
what was the best thing you bought? everything. I love it all. I cannot differentiate between the beautiful bounty I have heaped upon myself. unfortunately it may slide over onto my side of the bed and smother me in the night. but I've had a good innings. 
whose behaviour merited celebration? alber elbaz par lanvin.
 whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed? the cunts at the Food Standards Agency. THEY ARE BANNING BATTENBERG CAKE

THE GUARDIAN of all newspapers is leaping daily mail-style onto their soapbox in nationalistic defence of this great, grand sceptred isle's love of additive-laden superfoods. foods that are super not because of the benefit to your bones or spleen or that shit, but simply because they are supertasty. HOW IT SHOULD BE.
that cake may be pink and yellow thanks to an unruly combination of tartrazine, ponceau 4R, carmoisine, allura red and quinoline yellow. but the combination of love, guts and BRITISH PRIDE renders this lovable chunky of patriotism RED WHITE AND BLUUUUUE.
sorry I watched 'this is england' while eating a pot noodle and I think it addled my brain.

where did most of your money go? TO SHORE UP THE CRUMBLING ECONOMY. everyone should do their bit. mainly in selfridges&co. 
what did you get really, really, really excited about? the gilmore girls.
compared to this time last year, are you:  
i. happier or sadder? far happier. 
ii. thinner or fatter? uh, paradoxically I'm probably fucking fatter. 
iii. richer or poorer? hahaha. 
what do you wish you'd done more of? SLEEPING.
 what do you wish you'd done less of? moping around over boys like a proper dirty bummer. 
how did you spend Christmas? pretending I was jewish. 
did you fall in love in 2008? maybe a little, but in a good way..
how many one-night stands? more than I would have liked. 
what was your favourite TV program? still hollyoaks.
 do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? no. I've sort of stopped hating people. even christophe decarnin at balmain isn't boiling my vitriol anymore. 
what was the best book you read? I'm now wondering if I actually read a new book in 2008. depressing. 
what was your greatest musical discovery? heartbreak and kap bambino. utterly. 
what did you want and get? everything. 
what did you want and not get? nothing of consequence.
 what music will you remember from this year? rihanna at galliano, lcd soundsystem at yves saint laurent, this charming man at alexander mcqueen. god, I'm too fucking fashion for words.
what did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I was fourteen and we had cake. let the confusion commence... 
what one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? sexual relations with either johnny langer or quentin delafon. or a thom browne suit without the seemingly necessary financial limb-loss. 
how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008? subtly schizophrenic, sweetheart. 
what kept you sane? the megalolz.
 which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

most of the guantanamo bay inmates. what can I say, I have a thing for swarthy men with starved physiques and big noses.
what political issue stirred you the most? please see the above. who do you miss? penny. 
who was the best new person you met? antony mother fucking price. 
tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008: five things not to say in a gay bar:
1. well, fuck me.
2. bottoms up.
3. toss your for the next round.
4. can I bum a fag?
5. will you push my stool in? 
quote a song lyric that sums up your year: we've only just begun.

happy new year cuntbags.

love,
Alex.

home. ohs. (12/23/08) [View | Hide]

well, I am homeward bound. just like those fucking stupid rats. or dogs, or whatever the hell they were. as if I've ever even seen that film. seriously, I watched watership down as a child and was so hideously scarred by the horror of it that I've stayed well away from any kind of animal-orientated wholesome family viewing ever since. just so you know.

so yes, I am on my way back to the north. originally, the plan was for six days. please bear in mind last year I lasted thirty-six hours, so this was always optimistic. I've cut it short to four already, god knows when I will actually return.

this time I am gracing the wonder of peachy nan with my presence. after the popes little contre temps with the fagz, I have a horrible suspicion that BOY FAGBASHED TO DEATH BY OWN NAN is a distinct red-top headline possibility this yuletide.

then again, it's pretty much my own fault if I insist on going home in a fleshy margiela body and this beauty:

A KNITTED FOX. AMAZING. actually, mine is knitted INTO the neck of a cardigan. even better. they have the plastic skulls and eyes taxidermists use, so they are kind of creepily lifelike. and still chic.

so, it was my birthday, as so few noticed. AND RIGHTLY SO. my true age is subtly veiled in mystery, my passport is well hidden and pretty much every age is slightly inaccurate. I'm not quite sure where this came from, but all of a sudden I came to the realisation that I AM DYING AND I WILL NOT HAVE PEOPLE COUNT DOWN TO DOOMSDAY ON ME.

at the same time, at least I got presents. the pick of the bunch?

kaiser karl diet book. I AM LOSING 14 STONE IN A DAY WITH THIS BABY.

celine dion mug. HOW CAN'T THIS BE GREAT, SERIOUSLY! also pls be respecting my imitation 'infinity' bendy card backdrop.

PRINCESS DIANA 1982 OFFICIAL ROYAL WEDDING DOLL ARGH ARGH ARGH
YEAH OFFICIALLY THE BEST THING EVER.
COMPLETE with 2.5 FOOT train, oversized nose and wistful expression. probably because she has been consoling AIDS victims and blowing up landmines.. she is perched alongside cher, dolly et al on my shelf of shite.

anyway, this deserves far more attention than I am able or willing to give it right now. and FYI I am definitely becoming a hasidic jew after this. circumcision or no circumcision, it'll be worth it to never ever have to think, talk or HEAR about your 'christmas' EVER AGAIN you heathen bastards.

happy hanukkah.

love,
Alex.

ARGH ARGH ARGH ARGH ARGH (12/9/08) [View | Hide]

not dead yet. (12/3/08) [View | Hide]

this has taken way way way way way way way too long. and now there are far too many things to say and not enough time or space to say them.

a picture says a thousand words, right? so I supppppppose here's five thousand or so. that do you?

my hair has gone and I can now see. those glasses are FOR REAL. actually terry richardson ones given out at the terryworld exhibition and kindly fag-snagged for me by one of my homo friends (he was rewarded with sexing so really, it wasn't such a loss for him)
anyway, yeah, grrrrreat. fags make passes at fags with glasses. I have the lovebites to prove it you ~~guys~~ gays.

so, I'm fashion director at SHOWstudio. essentially, it means I get to look at frocks all day and then write nasty things about them. at least, that's my succinct summary. what it actually entails is seventy-something hour weeks (but now only at one place), long shoots, fashion weeks, lots of meetings and getting to do what I always dreamed of. my project on antony price launches next week (who else was I going to start with, really?). last week I was at his house, leafing through sketches including original drawings for just about all of roxy music's artwork. the weekend before I was styling a shoot with this - and dancing around in it a little bit at home. there I am with a balenciaga solar panel dress.

and here I am with a kaiser karl bag. yeah, it's great. alas, not mine. YET.

in a sense, this also leads me to prattle a bit about my new stuff. I can't even begin to list the shit I have bought. there's far too much. I'll do something about it all soon, but essentially, I am a financial miscreant. I can't be trusted with more than twenty quid. or even twenty quid if there's a sample sale in the vicinity. which, god bless the credit crunch whichIstillbelieveCATAGORICALLYwasnotisnotwillnotbereallyrealdonotgetmestarteduntilyou'vereadbaudrillard seems to be every day. tomorrow is mcqueen. get in my way and I will willingly donkeypunch you.

on a semi-similar note:

CLLLLLLAUDIA FOR YSL!
she was at the show in pariche (darlings) and I didn't put two and two together until I got this little treat in my inbox. I think generalement that she looks like un chien de pug (slash de fug) but shag me senseless here she looks INCREDIBLE. it's kind of leni riefenstahl but that's not such a bad thing. triumph of the will. or perhaps triumph of the bill when I've shelled out for 8 or 9k of dropped-crotch nonsense courtesy of signor stefano (see what I mean about my financial predicament?)

finally... download THIS:
HEARTBREAK / ROBOT'S GOT THE FEELING

ARGH SERIOUSLY TAKE THE TIME TO CLICK AND DOWNLOAD YOU FAGGOTS THIS IS THE BEST THING YOU WILL EVER HEAR IN YOUR LIFE EVER. RIP OUR YOUR EARDRUMS AFTER LISTENING FOR TRULY IT DOES NOT GET BETTER AND NOTHING SHOULD SULLY THE ABSOLUTE, UTTER PERFECTION OF THIS MAAAAAASTERPIECE.

yeah, it's good. I saw them in milan at the weekend. where I stayed with the milan boy (from way back when) and it was some kind of wonderful. holly jolly holidays and all that shit. at this rate I'll probably next update in about 2026.

love,
Alex.

enjoy the silence? (8/3/08) [View | Hide]

parisian perfection (3/4/08) [View | Hide]

Alexander McQueen (2/29/08) [View | Hide]

yves saint laurent rive gauche. (2/28/08) [View | Hide]

LONDON’S CALLING (2/19/08) [View | Hide]

HOUSE OF HOLLAND

There were rumours of a 30-odd piece collection at Gareth Pugh (21, but close enough). There were rumours of Kate Moss at Westwood (no Moss, but a bare-breasted placard-toting transexual did close the show). There were rumours Marios Schwab threw out his entire collection a month before the show (that one, Schwab told me, was true – and he’s all the greater for it). London Fashion Week was bigger and – dare we say it? – better than it has been for ten years.

Despite the bright mood throughout the city, London’s fashion offering was decidedly dark – then again, this is what we do best. You know something is afoot when you can look at Basso and Brooke’s usually retina-detaching wares without groping for sunglasses, and even Luella proferred something lightly macabre, inspired by Britt Ekland in the Wicker Man and a Cornwall Pagan Witch museum.

GARETH PUGH

The man most probably responsible is Gareth Pugh, the black sheep of British fashion who delivered pretty much exactly what we expected of him. This season, however, he did churn out 21 looks (an admirable feat) and a collection that made coherent sense in the way his previous offerings have fallen short. This was a whirlwind ride – well, the Wizard of Oz was the loose theme – taking in Swarovski-crystal leggings, lashings of monkey fur and geodesic abstractions galore. However, there was the real feeling that Pugh worked to push his look forward somewhat, from spectacular covetable Nicholas Kirkwood platforms to the exaggerated (but entirely on-trend) Montana-esque tailoring that opened the show: the fact they were made entirely of zips made them all the more impressive, not just schlocky horror pieces. As with Oz, it was all about the man behind the curtain, and even I have to admit perhaps there’s more behind’s Pugh’s playful polyhedra than mere flash and dazzle.

Pugh’s offering was indicative of London’s direction as a whole: a consolidation of talent, and proving that we can deliver what we promise. Alexander McQueen’s legacy still means that London is considered a sartorial Dark Prince next to the polish of Milan, the gloss of New York and the dripping bougeoise soignée of Paris. Todd Lynn has always excelled at the dark side of life, and his strong show was sharp and tailored, blurring the masculine-feminine divide in bruised shades of purple, blue and every permutation of black. Louise Goldin’s technicolor spring show darkened for winter, in a collection that was part Logan’s Run part Nanook of the North. Her Swarovski-frosted knits, futuristic fur-trimmed angular anoraks and Constructivist body-con knits in a palette of bruise, amethyst and teal were stunning. Even Emma Cook, the booky, kooky London queen of cute, reinterpreted her signature babydoll shapes in a collection of exquisitely patchworked lace and tie-dyed latex which managed to make Goth Cowgirl a viable option for next season – even with the slightly Jon Benet Ramsey Swarovski-fringed showgirl frocks.

LOUISE GOLDIN

Lightening the mood somewhat was Henry Holland, who has rapidly set himself up as the Jester of London’s fashion court. His plaid-packed House of Holland highland fling was inconsequential nonsense, but hit a high note because that was exactly what he intended it to be. It was icing on the cake that the fun clothes – lurid tartans, cashmere-mohairs and a clever way with knife-pleating – were well-made and interesting, even if not particularly innovative. The finale of Agyness as a Brigadoon Bride in tiered kilt wedding-gown, tartan antlers and eyepatch, was pretty hard to top.

In a frankly stellar season, two shows stood out for their consummate skill, grace and for finally shifting fashion (at least London Fashion) up a gear. Giles Deacon finally moved on his more-oft-than-not clumsy couture techniques into a new realm. His theme was The Masque of the Red Death by Poe, and his collection was the best from his hand since his first show under his own label. There was something Schiaparelli-esque about the duchesse satin suits, their jackets puffed with down to Superman proportions: but like Schiap's subtley surreal pre-war suiting, Giles’ offering combined concept and chic perfectly. For evening, Mr Deacon thankfully didn’t turn to any of his usually shonky shenanigans in floor-length amateur dramatics: merely flawlessly-cut torso-hugging sheaths and billowing capes, with a shadowed, rotted palette of damson, petrol-blue and olive rendering the silken fabrics even more luxurious. Most exquisite were the models with their faces wrapped in featherlight silk-chiffon, although their anonymous beauty begged inherent accusations of chauvenism and the idea of seeing woman as sexualised and yet emotionless automata.

If Giles’ collection brought up questions of sexism, Marios Schwab’s brought outright accusations of misogyny. Models, smothered in pattern from high neck to ankle in restrictive tubular dresses hobbled slowly along the runway in six-inch heels. The procession was undeniably uncomfortable, and yet fascinating to watch. If the collection was bad, this would have been a death-knell for a young designer still refining his vision - however, this was a definitive, authoritive statement in which everything, everything looked horrfyingly new. The length and cut were severe in the extreme, some dresses sliced open to form windows onto the body while others were laser-cut to peel away from the form like layers of mildewing textile disintegrating with every step. The collection’s namesake, the feminist novella ‘The Yellow Wallpaper,’ formed a narrative justification for every aspect of the show, and despite a general move away from ‘conceptual’ fashion, it was this concept which made the collection so powerful. The strict attenuated silhouette, faultless styling, exquisite accessories and claustrophic Nick Ryan soundtrack made Schwab’s chilling vision the highlight of london fashion week. This collection pushed his aesthetic – and indeed London Fashion as a whole - to a new level.

GILES MARIOS SCHWAB

love,
Alex.

I hate fashion. (2/14/08) [View | Hide]

I love fashion. (2/9/08) [View | Hide]

LE UPDATE (2/5/08) [View | Hide]

JEUDI 28 FÉVRIER 2008
09:30 am STELLA MCCARTNEY Carreau du Temple
10:30 am VALENTINO Palais de Chaillot - 1 place du Trocadéro - Paris 16e
11:30 am LÉONARD Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Delorme*
~~12:30 pm BARBARA BUI Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Le Nôtre*~~
1:30 pm ANNE VALÉRIE HASH Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Soufflot*
2:30 pm GIAMBATTISTA VALLI Espace Eiffel - Quai Branly - Paris 7e
3:30 pm ZUCCA École Nationale Supérieure des Beaux-Arts - Salle Melpomène - 13 quai Malaquais - Paris 6e
4:30 pm CELINE Espace Ephémère Tuileries - Jardin des Tuileries – Paris 1er
5:30 pm HAIDER ACKERMANN Couvent des Cordeliers - 15 rue de l'Ecole de Médecine - Paris 6e
6:30 pm SOPHIA KOKOSALAKI Palais de Tokyo
8:00 pm YVES SAINT LAURENT Grand Palais - avenue Winston Churchill - Paris 8e

un hhardcore jour, je pense. je n’aime pas stella mccartney mais elle est mon premier défilé a la Paris et par consequence je pense je dois montrer mon visage. cependant, je dois levez a 4 ou 5hr pour le eurostar, donc mon visage semblera rugueux de la cul d’un badger.

quel a shit. mais je peux encore porter mes poussoirs de velours de ysl.

‘poussoirs’ is possible mon favouri mot de français. ou franglais, a mon interprétation. ou something.

I have decided I am dressing like a comedy frenchy for my first day in paris. I figure mascara through the moustache, black beret, stripy gaultier matelot and this almost utterly the same as every other coat I have charles anastase mini-french-trench

and a hideous printed scarfy-cravat and maybe some kind of huge diamanté PARIS brooch or a stick-on eiffel tower of like a loaf of pain or whatever else the frenchies are wearing pour les hivers.

man I am totally going to die ouvert la manche if I have to rely on these linguistic skills.

love,
Alex.

p.s.

this is utterly what I haaaave to use for the whole of pariche fashion week. totally (hahah tote-ally worst pun ever a french man is going to beat me to death with a jour-old baguette for that punny lingus).

p.p.s. is buying an oversized, out-of-season pleated leather-trimmed crimbo kane cardigan with diamond buttons a bad idea, or THE BEST I’VE EVER HAD?

merci mode à paris. (1/30/08) [View | Hide]

THURSDAY FEBRUARY 2008 THE 28TH – to be confirmed

FRIDAY FEBRUARY 2008 THE 29TH
09:30 am HIROMICHI NAKANO Carré des Champs-Elysées - Pavillon Ledoyen - 1 avenue Dutuit - Paris 8e
10:30 amCHANEL Grand Palais - avenue du Général Eisenhower - Paris 8e
11:30 am AGNÈS B. Palais de Tokyo - 13 avenue du Président Wilson - Paris 16e
12:30 pm JEAN-CHARLES DE CASTELBAJAC Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Delorme*
~~1:30 pm ALENA AKHMADULLINA Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Soufflot*~~
2:30 pm SONIA RYKIEL Espace Ephémère Tuileries – Jardin des Tuileries – Paris 1er
3:30 pm JUNKO SHIMADA To be confirmed
4:30 pm RUE DU MAIL (by Martine Sitbon) Ecole Nationale Supérieure des Beaux-Arts - Salle Melpomène - 13 quai Malaquais - Paris 6e
5:30 pm ES ORCHESTRES To be confirmed
6:30 pm JOSE CASTRO To be confirmed
8:00 pm ALEXANDER MCQUEEN Palais Omnisports de Paris Bercy - Salle Marcel Cerdan - Porte 28 - 8 boulevard de Bercy - Paris 12e

SATURDAY MARCH 2008 THE 1ST
10:30 am KENZO Carreau du Temple - 3 rue Dupetit Thouars - Paris 3e
~~11:30 am ELIE SAAB Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Delorme *~~
12:30 pm WUNDERKIND Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Soufflot*
~~1:30 pm PAUL & JOE Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Le Nôtre*~~
~~2:30 pm COMMUUN Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Gabriel*~~
3:30 pm CHLOÉ Espace Ephémère Tuileries - Jardin des Tuileries - Paris 1er
4:30 pm MARTIN GRANT École Nationale Supérieure des Beaux-Arts - Salle Melpomène - 13 quai Malaquais - Paris 6e
5:30 pm HERMÈS Espace Eiffel - Quai Branly - Paris 7e
6:30 pm LIMI FEU To be confirmed

SUNDAY MARCH 2008 THE 2ND
10:00 am VANESSA BRUNO 8 rue de la Pierre Levée - Paris 11e
11:00 am NINA RICCI Espace Ephémère Tuileries - Jardin des Tuileries - Paris 1er
~~12:00 pm CHAPURIN Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Delorme*~~
~~1:00 pm YUKI TORII Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Gabriel*~~
~~2:00 pm COLETTE DINNIGAN Le Carrousel du Louvre - Salle Soufflot*~~
3:00 pm LOUIS VUITTON See invitation
~~- SAKINA M'SA To be confirmed~~
5:30 pm LANVIN Espace Eiffel - Quai Branly - Paris 7e
6:30 pm MOON YOUNG HEE To be confirmed
7:30 pm MIU MIU See invitation
8:30 pm CHADO RALPH RUCCI To be confirmed

god, those 'to be confirmed' slots are killing me. and the WHOLE of thursday?! what the fuck how the HELL can I plan outfits. jesus.

this is what paris is totally going to be like. i swear to jesus. six foot runways, pink poodles and everyone tryna be 'san loron'. ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES! jer'my hasn't confirmed when he's showing yet. if I get to see him I will weep weep hot tears of joy.

I am wearing head-to-toe backwards PARIS prints and ted lapidus sunglasses.

oh, I'm totally a one trick pony until 3rd march. just so you all know.

love,
Alex.

2007. (1/15/08) [View | Hide]

this is a classic, and always depressing, way to while away time when I should be sleeping post NYE.

what did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before? my first real fashion show, my first real fashion shoot, my first real fashion life, work work work work, graduated, got a ~~very expensive~~ haircut that made me cry, was photographed naked – actually, being photographed by someone else and actually liking the pictures is a first.
how did you see in the new year? shitfaced with sweaty gays in dior homme. god, déja vu much?
did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I definitely had more sex, and the hair has been savagely sliced. although I cried for three hours afterwards (the hair, not the sex). my resolution this year is to write something which reaches the zenith of literary perfection that is ‘no lifeguard on duty: the accidental life of the world’s first supermodel’ by janice dickinson.

did someone close to you give birth? possibly. maybe. I don’t really deal with children except for reborns
did anyone close to you die? isabella blow. god, isabella. I’m still not really over it. I started crying thinking about her on the bus the other day please don’t ask me why.
what countries did you visit? greece. does the frozen tundra of my northern homeland count as a separate country? it should.
what would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007? liquidised lamb foetuses injected into my face FOREVER YOUNG
what date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? so so many, good and bad. this was a memorable year.
what was your biggest achievement(s) of the year? graduating, getting published and working for marios and SHOW would be pretty incredible achievements to the me of this time last year.
what was/were your biggest failure(s)? don’t confront me with them.
did you suffer illness or injury? I’m always fucking ill.
what was the best thing you bought? yves saint laurent embroidered velvet evening slippers.
whose behaviour merited celebration? lulu kennedy, penny martin, sophie, ute, maria – in fact, maison marios and all who sail in her (special thanks to mr schwab). essentially, everyone who took a chance on a dickhead with a stupid haircut straight out of s’marts. and special thanks to my svengali professor rebecca arnold.
whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed? I’m over being appalled or depressed by anything other people do. I managed to disappoint myself though, as always.
where did most of your money go? you tell me.
what did you get really, really, really excited about? cakes, biscuits, moustaches, dresses.
compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? hard to tell.
ii. thinner or fatter? I can finally, inexorably, unequivocally say I am SCIENTIFICALLY thinner than last year. with a BMI teetering at a precarious 18.9. fuck. yeah.
iii. richer or poorer? richer. and yet poorer.
what do you wish you'd done more of? savouring the moment.
what do you wish you'd done less of? regretting things I couldn’t change. resenting things. ignoring problems (but that’s a lifetime habit, honestly). worrying endlessly. does the list ever end?
how will you be spending Christmas? yet again I spent it waterbound and freezing to death. I wish my parents were landlubbers.
did you fall in love in 2007? yes.
how many one-night stands? just enough. just about.
what was your favourite TV program? totally hollyoaks.
do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? amy fucking eleanor still.
what was the best book you read? it’s a toss-up between the beautiful fall and janice dickinson.
what was your greatest musical discovery? rediscovering dolly parton recently was wonderful. otherwise, maybe jamaican dancehall?
what did you want and get? so much.
what did you want and not get? too much.
what music will you remember from this year? dutty wiiine an da hot wuk bwoy.
what did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I am somewhere in my twenties nothing happened we do not discuss it it never occurred capisce?
what one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? better hair and jer’my scott 3-D spex.
how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007? reckless, child-sized and far beyond my means.
what kept you sane? maison marios schwab, and numerous over-the-counter drugs in dangerous combinations.
which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

totally tori spelling.
what political issue stirred you the most? they still have politics these days?
who do you miss? issy. if only as a front-row fixture from afar.
who was the best new person you met? leo.
tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007: every silver lining has a cloud.
quote a song lyric that sums up your year: non, je ne regrette rien.

real resolutions:
eat less, but better.
drink less, but better.
spend more, but better.
say ‘no’ more.
try to be more confrontational.
try to be more mature.
think.

love,
Alex.

p.s. if you faygelahs are that was inclined you can go to SHOWstudio and hear my horrible faggy self interviewing the lovely damien jalet about choreographing Bernhard Willhelm's Men in Tights.
here
and there

p.p.s. god I am so sick my face is a pizza of pain.

overworked, overpaid, over-overspending. (1/10/08) [View | Hide]

well, I haven’t updated this for eons.
well, since november, properly. never prone to hyperbole.
maybe it’s better expressed in pictures than in words?

then again, according to these pictures I have lost about 15 years in age and am a catholic schoolboy (with overdeveloped facial hair) in the ‘total eclipse of the heart’ video.

contrary to the above, I am slogging and blogging at SHOWstudio, I swear. oh and loving every second. it really is wonderful. I’m trying not to gush. I miss marios’, the craziness was great and everyone there was lovely and it felt so fashion, but SHOW is a different rhythm and different environment. and no less fashion, really. just different.

unfortunately I haven’t really been too good at unleashing the full extent of my fairly-extensive wardrobe on my (almost) unsuspecting editor. the willhelm monkey-suit and bottega veneta neon leopard will have to wait. well, at least until fashion week. it’ll be a change from her seeing me dressed as what equates to a john lewis attired st trinians extra, though.

yeah so in november I saw princess superstar. she may have some kind of restraining order or something against me now, as I did insist on talking to her a little too often. and trying to force her to dance with me. and for some reason I gave her a beret. don’t ask.

I have been relatively good so far, purchase wise. all I have bought are a pair of dior glitter-jeans that are ‘unwashable’ (according to the label YEAH), a pair of eggshell-blue mcqueen shoes with each shoe a different size (neither mine) and a 1992 chanel belt with COCO written in 2-inch metallic letters and a logo on the end about as big as my noggin.

oh, and these:

SO SO BEAUTIFUL REALLY.
I have no idea why this picture makes me look like I have gout. never wearing them with white socks again, that’s for sure. even if they did almost get thoroughly ruined at new years

impractical footwear is apparently what 2008 is all about for me. I am hankering after patent dries van noten pumps with a tuxedo bow and navy mcqueen patent winklepickers. and we all assumed what with two jobs I would at least try to claw my way slightly out of debt. pft.

penny, my editrix, keeps threatening to take me for offal at the st. john bar and restaurant. I can cope with lancashire cheese and an eccles cake, but offal is a step too far, even for a child from the north.

happy new year. homos.

love,
Alex.

great scott. (12/14/07) [View | Hide]

SHOW's on the road. (10/18/07) [View | Hide]

before we get going, I would like to state for the record that i do not have GAIDS, or renal failure or any of that shit.
the 'doctor' thinks I have some horrendous stomach infection and needs to give me morphine or something and knock me out for a week. which is pretty hot.
and she has actually prescribed me SUNLIGHT because I have some kind of vitamin d deficiency.which accounts for my carnation milk-like skin-tone.
I tried to explain that I cower from sunlight and spend my waking hours slumped in the studio, wrapped in tulle and swarovskis being inspirational and trying to choke down a triangle of toblerone, but I don't think she took me seriously. it happens a lot.

so, SHOWstudio is wonderful. pretty much.

THIS is the piece they have already had me write READ IT NOW ALL OF YOU.

still bleary-eyed at 9.30am, nothing short of the Mandi Lennard press day could jolt me out of my usual self-induced coma this morning. ‘fearsome’ was the theme - this season there was enough fluoro, lurid animal prints and heroin-strength coffee to keep even a narco like me wide-eyed and bushy-tailed.

god I fucking loved the danielle scutt shit. as usual, the stinky pugh stuff didn't really impress me so much. although I liked quite a bit of it, and overall it was way better than I assumed shocking quality, but I'm shocked by a lot of catwalk samples in the flesh, really. I was born for couture. more of which later...

penny martin, the editor in chief, is absolutely lovely. plus she is endearingly amazed-slash-horrified at my total fashion recall she asked me to find the colour of all the givenchy skirts from last season. I knew them off the top of my head. I think I scared her. and we have already had an in-depth discussion about what bag I should purchase next. for the record, we seemed to decide on an oversized vintage 2.55, although i am kind of concerned it may make me look like an absolute faggot. penny insists I should try it, at least. and I'm a sucker for a bit of gilt, honestly.
I'm well-suited, I think.

on the subject of SHOW, this is possibly the greatest thing I have seen in a long long time:

I'm slightly afraid I may come face to face (or otherwise) with this type of situation daily at SHOWstudio. but I wouldn't mind ganking a pair of those underpants.
I really really love the entire thing. it's stunning, you all have to see it and tell your friends. but possibly not your parents.

I want this so badly my groin is practically in my mouth. I do realise I could knock it up from a primark jumper with a sofa cushion on each shoulder but really that's not the point.
I was trying to explain the inexplicable appeal of the plain white margiela label to some mere mortals, but they couldn't grasp the concept. slash-conceit. really.

not that I will actually be buying anything new EVER as I am currently beyond-broke. especially after wasting a dickhole of money on a stupid grindie duffle coat from john lewis' school department.
yes, I think I was more enamoured by the fact I could cram myself into a 26-inch CHEST coat than anything else, but bitch please sixty-something quid is totally worth that kind of ego-boost and besides I've worn it every day and lots of people seem to like it so maybe it wasn't as hairbrained as I assumed.

god, I actually have nothing else to say. or maybe my duffle's just cutting of circulation to my brain...

love,
Alex.

p.s. best show in paris? sonia rykiel, totally.

manorexic. (9/28/07) [View | Hide]

oh val... (9/6/07) [View | Hide]

thock it to me. (8/25/07) [View | Hide]

so racist. (6/4/07) [View | Hide]

I need to cut my hair. drastically. in every sense of the word. but really I have no idea what to do… only strong strong ideas of what NOT to do.

I mean, okay - when exactly did bowl-cuts come back for boys?

they look great on girls, but I have no desire to look like a clarissa explains it all sidekick circa 1992. thanks.

hey saaam.

oh but I can’t just blame melissa joan hart’s dentistry for my overwhelming urge to ‘blow chunks’ fergwad.

I have officially finished at saint martins. I can’t even take out books anymore. although I fully intend to sneak in and steal wireless and watch the vivienne westwood on liberty tape on a pretty much constant basis. which also sums up my current plans for the future.

I’m starting at marios schwab in a few week (unless that’s all gone tits up) but pft I don’t know. I’m really tired right now. Not that a chance to do a cheeky circuit of the studio in this number wouldn’t perk me up

what boy could resist?

I’m not sure how the whole b.a. thing has gone, but only time will tell. although my 60p of library fines will apparently prevent the exam board from looking at my thesis, as I was officiously informed today by some cretin. annoyed? me? nah.

I’m going to the gareth poo (childish, but it works for me) fashion in motion thing at the V&gAy. yes, gareth pugh. sixty outfits into a fucking four-year ‘career’ and he gets a retrospective at the vam. it even took viv thirty four frigging years, this is just rude.

as leo so rightfully asked, exactly who is he fucking?

I am looking forward to seeing the likes of this in person

and maybe that great thing he did with the key or some of the fashion house shit. although I bet he doesn’t even show his old stuff after all now he’s decided to 'sell' (out).

so leo made a beautiful doll and is going to japan. which I cannot afford (in time or in cash). which is crap - although I am sending him with a shopping list. which basically consists of KEWPIE PASTA SAUCE-A and very little else.
I am obsessed with the creepy tarako kewpie babies. look at these.

and by the way leo you totally have to get me one of these:

why do some of them have tears? why do others not? what is difference between happy kewpie and sad kewpie? why I accidentally write like stereotype japanese person?

otherwise I would just settle for a jigglypuff costume.

he’s also flying with air france so I am obviously forcing him to take pictures of the air hostesses in their amazing comedy ribboned lacroix uniforms. or possibly to punch one out and steal one for me.

chiiiiiiiiiic.
yes leo is officially living the dream. I wish I could go. so.

love,
Alex.

p.s. oh, and as a few people seem interested – my shit is on eGay, but not for much longer.

p.p.s. this is what the eGay sale is all about.

because I’m worth it.

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Comments

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antifashion

Comment left on: 4/19/09 3:28 PM

You totally should... your boyfriend is a twat.

xxx

Inanition

Comment left on: 2/27/09 1:24 PM

great work at showstudio.

martingreg

Comment left on: 2/7/09 4:59 PM

It's the only david e. sugar song I knew. I guess I should investigate more... there's a song of his that blew your mind but you don't know the title?

kaleid

Comment left on: 1/23/09 10:44 AM

yup, allo!

diesell

Comment left on: 1/6/09 12:27 PM

martingreg

Comment left on: 12/29/08 9:59 PM

2010...a while's away. i'll probably be there mid january. i'm excited to go though...finally experience something different.

Olimoose

Comment left on: 12/23/08 8:33 PM

It is indeed!
I'm glad you like it :). Have you been?

x

martingreg

Comment left on: 12/19/08 12:14 AM

How's London? I'm headed there next spring... So close, yet so far.

JackMitchell

Comment left on: 12/18/08 2:57 PM

hey i'm feeling much much better now, i love hayley she is a gem! you should put insurance on your westwood and start charging haha. how are you? x

JackMitchell

Comment left on: 12/15/08 7:05 PM

does she have black hair with a blond fringe? i know alot of hayleys, but she is the most prominant, if so then yes i do know her, give her a hug from me.
i'm ill and i feel like i have the plague, i can just about see and i am coughing every two mins and when i cough its like someone is smashing my head with a hammer. being ill sucks.
x